Quit Negative Self-Talk for Good and Discover the Life You've Always Wanted
Starred review from March 16, 2020
Psychologist Bonior (Psychology), who writes the Baggage Check column for the Washington Post, dazzles in this smart, sensible guide to vanquishing negative thoughts. The key step for changing internal dialogue, she argues, is making thoughts less “sticky” by realizing that not every thought should be given equal power. “Negative thoughts don’t cause depression and anxiety disorders—it’s when such thoughts become sticky that they can grow into depression and anxiety disorders,” she writes before offering an easy strategy to dispel them—acknowledge the troubling thought, label it, remind oneself to give space to the thought, ground oneself in the present moment, and visualize the thought passing. She teaches readers to let go of intrusive negative trains of thought—particularly ruminating on the past and thinking about how the world should be rather than how it is—and outlines how to see one’s blind spots and confront one’s discomfort. In an empathetic tone, Bonior invites readers to celebrate even the smallest steps as they seek greater self-compassion. This witty, wise handbook’s outstanding blueprint for achieving lasting happiness will be of aid to any reader prone to self-doubt.
Starred review from May 1, 2020
If you can't change your situation, you can always change your thoughts about it. So says licensed clinical psychologist Bonoir, who writes to those whose worried, negative thoughts get in the way of their moods, relationships, and work. Using cognitive behavior therapy, acceptance and commitment therapies, Bonoir offers tools and techniques for overcoming common mental traps, such as thoughts that urge one to run from discomfort, seek approval over connection, and buy into the myth of arrival. She supports these suggestions through life stories, self-assessments, and practices that help readers neutralize the effects of stress, contradict negative thoughts, and build better habits. VERDICT Bonoir synthesizes psychological concepts into understandable suggestions certain to help any reader reclaim a healthy state of thinking.
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