Life's Last Gift

September 11, 2017
Garfield (Sometimes My Heart Goes Numb), founder of the Shanti Project, a service organization dedicated to those with terminal illnesses, believes dying people need to hear someone say, “I will stand with you in the midst of despair.” From this standpoint, he entreats caregivers of the dying to make nine commitments to themselves and their loved ones to “heal without cures.” He encourages caregivers to be as present as possible by listening, speaking, and acting from the heart to set a foundation for care. Garfield tackles these topics with clinical experience as well as with the firsthand account of managing the end of life for his mother and father. In one reflection, he courageously shares his response when his mother brought up assisted suicide—although he understood her pain, he couldn’t actively allow her to die. Garfield shows how to resolve conflict and be supportive even when caregivers and the dying disagree about care. Deeply exploring tough topics such as pain management and relationship reconciliation, this resource will give readers a place to go for comfort, direction, and answers.

Starred review from October 1, 2017

Garfield, PhD and founder of the Shanti Project, a widely acclaimed AIDS and cancer service organization, delivers a compassionate guide to help friends and families ease a loved one's final days. Readers learn how to apply a series of commitments to the dying (e.g., promising to remember that person's wisdom), which, according to the author, sustains emotional closeness and nourishes the relationship. Exercises on death personalization and empathy and outlined starting points for small but significant actions are included, with Garfield adding, "be sure to say goodbye." VERDICT A comprehensive end-of-life guide with extensive resources to benefit both the living and the dying.

Copyright 2017 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.